I. Goober's Green Breakfast

Goober Lear loved green eggs and bacon
He would spend hours on breakfast makin’
He loved his bacon grease
And eggs stirred in green cheese
He loved to cook but more the tastin’


II. Goober's Worst Fear

Goober badly missed his cousins dear
And on his lonesome days he did fear
Her cousins being girls
Could mean them cursed on twirls
Of ill mannered men like Goober Lear


III. Goober's Boring Day

One day found Goober bored of nothing
So he decided to do something
He tried flooding toilets
Making roaches his pets
But all went in vain and in sleeping


IV. Neither Medal Nor Ribbon

After years and years of practicing
Young Timothy Vane did win something
It wasn’t a medal
Or a ribbon regal
It was the love of his one darling


V. Turkey in Albuquerque

There was a girl in Albuquerque
Who really loved her share of turkey
She ate and she ate well
Her stomach she let swell
Till all she could eat was dry gravy


VI. Old Age

When old age turns to be your burden
And your youth seems to be forgotten
Remember photos dear
Memories, love and fear
From us, these will never be taken


VII. My Ticket

My ticket to London spelled trouble
After it said to bring a double
So without any choice
I brought my cousin Joyce
And I ended up decked in purple


VIII. My Flying Friend

On the Island of Dr. Moreau
I found an awkward friend through and through
She loved to cry and cry
And laugh at dreams to fly
Until she herself finally flew


IX. Hugs for a Pounding

I miss the days when I was just wee
Playing all morn with girls so pretty
There weren’t any rules
No perverts or sad fools
Unlike now when hugs are for a fee


X. My Dead Bestfriend

One of my best friends has long been dead
But this friendship has not yet ended
He would always be there
Whatever the weather
Days are not unlike what I have said